I don`t understand
Why are you being so mean?
You`re mean yo mean yeah man

You are just jealous of me
`Cuz you, you just can`t do what I do
So instead of just admitting it
You walk around and say
All kinds of really mean things about me
`Cuz you`re a meanie, a meanie

But it`s only `cuz you`re just really jealous of me
`Cuz I`m what you want to be
So you just look like an idiot
When you say these mean things
`Cuz it`s too easy to see
You`re just a really big weenie, big weenie

Alright listen, I need you to focus
I need you to go dig deep in your mind, this is important
We are going to perform an experiment of the sorts
I`m going to have to ask you to bare with me for a moment
Now I need you to open your mind, your eyes close them
You are now about to be placed under my hypnosis
For the next four and a half minutes
We are going to explore into your mind
To find out why you`re so f**kin` jealous
Now why did they make yoo-hoo?
Hippity ca-ca boo-boo

Psych, I`m kidding
I just wanted to see if you`re still listenin`
Ok, now I need your undivided attention
Sir, I have a question
Why do I always sense this undeniable tension
From the moment that I enter into the room?
It gets all quiet and whispers
Whenever there`s conversation, why am I always mentioned?
I`ve been dying to ask, it`s been itchin` at me
Is it just because

You are just jealous of me
`Cuz you, you just can`t do what I do
So instead of just admitting it
You walk around and say
All kinds of really mean things about me
`Cuz you`re a meanie, a meanie

But it`s only `cuz you`re just really jealous of me
`Cuz I`m what you want to be
So you just look like an idiot
When you say these mean things
`Cuz it`s too easy to see
You`re really just a big weenie, big weenie

Alright now, aww s**t I, I just flubbed a line
I was going to say something extremely important
But I forgot who or what it was, I f**ked up
Psych, I`m kidding again you idiot, no I didn`t
That`s just what you wanted to hear from me
Is that I f**ked up ain`t, it?
But I can bust one take without lookin` at no paper
It doesn`t take a bunch of takes
Or me to stand here in this booth all day
For me to say the truth, okay
You`re droolin`, you have tooth decay
Your mouth is open, you`re disgusting

What the f**k you eat for lunch
A bunch of sweets or something, what?
You munch a bunch of Crunch `n` Munch?
Your tooth is rotten to the gum
Your breath stinks, wanna chew some gum?
Yes I do sir, what am I on?
You sir are on truth syrum
Marshall I`m so jealous of you
Please say you won`t tell nobody
I`d be so embarrassed, I`m just absolutely terrified
That someone`s gonna find out why I`m saying
All these terrible, evil and awful mean things
It`s my own insecurity

You are just jealous of me
`Cuz you, you just can`t do what I do
So instead of just admitting it
You walk around and say
All kinds of really mean things about me
`Cuz you`re a meanie, a meanie

But it`s only `cuz you`re just really jealous of me
`Cuz I`m what you want to be
So you just look like an idiot
When you say these mean things
`Cuz it`s too easy to see
You`re just a really big weenie, big weenie

Alright now we, we`re going to conduct
That experiment that we were talking about earlier
Just to see what a frog looks like when it takes two hits of ecstasy
`Cuz that`s exactly what your eyes look like, want to check to see?
Here`s a mirror, notice the resemblance here?
Wait, let me put these sun glasses on
Now look in this mirror, how about now?
What do you have in common?
You`re both green with envy and look like idiots with sunglasses on `em
You look like I sound like singing about weenies
Now take my weenie out of your mouth

This is between me and you, I know you`re not happy
I know you`d much rather see me
Lying in the corner of a room somewhere crying
Curled up in a ball tweeked out of my mind dying
There is no denying that my weenie is much bigger than yours is
Mine is like sticking a banana between two oranges
Why you even doing this to yourself, it`s pointless
Why do we have to keep on going through this
This is torturous my point is this
That if you say mean things, weenie will shrink
Now I forgot what the chorus is, your just is

You are just jealous of me
`Cuz you, you just can`t do what I do
So instead of just admitting it
You walk around and say
All kinds of really mean things about me
`Cuz you`re a meanie, a meanie

But it`s only `cuz you`re just really jealous of me
`Cuz I`m what you want to be
So you just look like an idiot
When you say these mean things
`Cuz it`s too easy to see
You`re just a really big weenie, big weenie

F**k off my dick, heheheheheheium